Again David Timms has nailed it!
We are more concerned with our own victory over sin than the fact that our sin grieves the heart of God. We want to defeat it with sheer determination and glory in our achievement. However, sin is not about breaking the rules but ruining a relationship – our relationship with Him.
Our preoccupation with success hinders our pursuit of holiness. We are discouraged by our failure to defeat sin chiefly because we are success-oriented, not because we know it offends the Father. It might dramatically change our approach if we grasped the biblical truth that God wants us to walk in obedience – not victory . Obedience is oriented towards God; victory is oriented toward self.
The gospel declares that victory over sin belongs to Christ, not us. He has already conquered the power of sin and death (1 Cor 15.55-57). In another place, the Apostle Paul urged us to “consider ourselves dead to sin, and alive to God through Christ Jesus” (Rom 6.11). Victory was established at the Cross. Our response is to “not let sin reign in our mortal bodies” (Rom 6.12). We obediently “present the members of our bodies as instruments of righteousness to God” (Rom 6.13).
No Guarantees 
Preach it, brother…
Jesus taught the greatest commandment was to “Love the Lord our God with all our heart and with all our mind and with all our strength.”
If we figure out how this command is written on our hearts, the rest of the commands are written on our hearts.
So very true Scott, if only most Christians saw it this way it would save a lot of trouble!
This is definately an idea i ‘think’ but I don’t know if I have transferred that to what I say in a discipling situation, I think I still tend to rant and rave about getting rid of the sin(which is the negative) rather than getting the person to focus on their purpose…to be in right relationship with God(which is the positive)…which MEANS ridding yourself of sin but it comes out of an entirely different attitude, as you and Dave Timms have pointed out!
Actually Middo, I don’t take any credit for it, it’s all Dave Timms!